Monday, February 22, 2010

How Are You Going To Live?

"You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how your going to live. Now." ~Joan Baez~

I come to you with the question, why. Why do bad things happen to the people we love? Why do people have to deal with the death of a loved one? Why?

I guess I should back up a little bit. My sister-in-law texted me last night and said that her mother had fallen down her basement steps and they didn't think she was going to make it. At first, I looked at the text in disbelief. This can't be right, people don't die from falling down their steps. Do they? My sister-in-law's mother did pass away today at 1:00 p.m. She fell down her basement stairs and died. She was 58 years old. She leaves behind a husband, two daughters, parents, and two grandchildren. Her grandchildren are 3 years old and 5 months old. They are my nephew and niece. My heart breaks for my sister-in-law. I feel at a loss. I don't know what to think or to say. I truly believe that God has a master plan for all of us. He knows what is best, and we should never doubt His wisdom. When something like this happens all you can ask yourself is why.

I have been thinking, "How can I turn this into a positive?" I don't know that I can. I do know this; we are only given this one life on Earth. None of us knows what our future holds or when we will leave this world. All we can do is live. How much wasted time have we spent worry about things that are not important, disagreeing with the people we love, or refusing to see some one's point of view? How many opportunities have we wasted making excuses. "I can never do that; I am not good enough." "I can't follow my dream. I am too scared." We have all done and said things like this for most of our lives. We put things off over and over again, and say, "I will think about that tomorrow." It seems like we forget that one day, there will be no tomorrow.

This is how I think we can turn this tragedy into a positive. As soon as you finish reading this post, tell someone you love them. When you wake up tomorrow the first thing I want you to say is, "Thank you for giving me another day to live my life." We all should live each day like it is our last. If you have been dreaming of doing something, do it. Forget the excuses and try your hardest to achieve your dream. Do not take people for grated. Recognize them for the gift they are, and tell them how much you appreciate them. Try to forget petty disagreements and agree to love each other in sprite of our differences. Make it your goal that when your final day comes, you have no regrets,and you can say to yourself, "I had a wonderful life." "I lived everyday to its fullest."
I apologize that this post may not have been as uplifting as others, but I felt like I needed to say these things. I hope in some way it helped someone. Please remember my sister-in-law and her entire family in the days and weeks ahead.

Thank you for visiting Yesterday Once More. I appreciate all you kind comments and e-mails. I hope you have a relaxing evening and you are spending it with the people you love.

Take Care!
~Dan~

This post is dedicated in memory of my sister-in-law's mother. May her death inspire all of us to live.

34 comments:

basketsnprims said...

Dan,
I'm so sorry for this tragic loss in your family. How sad for this family and I think of the little ones and how they will miss their grandma. I will remember your sisiter-in-law and her family in prayer. It is so true that we never know how long we have to spend with our loved ones and we need to live each day as if it were our last.
be blessed ~
Pam

Carla said...

Dan,
I'm so sorry for your SIL's loss and for the whole family. You paid great tribute to her with your post. Beautiful words and ones we should all live by. Thank you for the reminder.
Fondly,
Carla

Tamera said...

Dan, so sorry for your family's loss. It just reinforces that we are only promised this moment. We need to make the best of each we are given.

Tamera at The Stone Fence Cottage

Donna~One Simple Country Girl said...

Dan,
I am so sorry to hear of this tragedy. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Thank you for the reminder that life is precious.
Much love and hugs being sent your way,
Donna

LeeHillPrimitives said...

Dan, I'm so sorry for your siter in law loss. This will be a difficult time for the whole family. Hugs, Evelyn

Audrey said...

Dan, I am so sorry to hear of this awful loss. My prayers are with all of you. Thank you for reminding us all how important it is to live life to it's fullest as no one is guarenteed tomorrow. It is important to treat each other well always and to say the loving things you feel and you will not have regrets when the chance is gone.

Brenda said...

So sorry for your family's loss! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family! Tomorrow is never promised.

Brenda

PrimWyoGirl said...

I am so sorry to hear about you SIL's mother. So young! One always wonder why... Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. You always have the right words....
Jayne

Wanda/Ridge Farm Nesting Place said...

Dan, I am so sorry for your families loss...all of you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Thank you for reminding us of the importance of life, there are no promises of tomorrows....love and live like there is no tomorrow.

Bless all of you through this time of sorrow.
(((Hugs)))
Wanda

Robyn said...

I am so sorry for your families loss. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.
I agree that we need to live our lives as if it were our last day.
Big hugs!

Dana~HomespunTreasures said...

Dan, I'm so sorry to hear about this tragic news!! Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Blessings,
Dana

Jody said...

How very sad for you and your family. God's peace to all of you during this time.

Carmen C. said...

Dan, I'm so sorry for your loss! A friend of mine lost her grandpa that way too, he fell down the cellar stairs and hit his head really hard. Your message is an inspiring one for us all to live by, enjoy each day, love those we still have with us and never take anything for granted. Hugs to you during this difficult time!

Benita said...

Dear Dan ~
I am so sorry for this tragic loss, and yes we should live everyday as if its our last and tell all of our loved ones and friends how much they mean to us. Your kindness and good heart means so much to me, take care sweetheart !
Love ~
Benita

sharong said...

Reading your blog today really touched me I will live today to the fullest . Thank you Dan God Bless You

Daisy Cottage said...

I am so sorry to hear about your family's loss Dan. There are no words. Life is indeed so very fragile.

I love your soul. What a gift you are to us in the way that you share your heart. I'm so glad we met here in Blogland.


Love,
Kim

Linda* ~ TheKeepingroom said...

Dan,
I will keep your family in my prayers.
Each day is truely a gift.
My parents are in their 80's and I know their days are numbered, so I thank God for everyday he gives me with them.
Blessings,
Linda*

thesimpledaze said...

You and your family are in my prayers I am so sorry for your sister in laws loss.You are right about life and how precious it is.Your post today has helped me very much with something personnel that I have been dealing with in my family a disagreement and I need to just let it go and not let it stand in me and my loved ones way.Thank you Dan and God bless you and you family in this tragic time.

Lynn said...

Dan, I am so sorry for your SIL's loss of her Mom. Gosh, one just never knows when we will be called home..
I will keep your SIL and family in my prayers.

You take care now, and "Thank You" for being YOU Dan!
You are one special young man, that's for sure, as your heart is always in the right place.

Blessings,
~Lynn

Colleen/And Baby Makes Five said...

Oh, Dan ... what an unexpected and tragic loss for your extended family. I'll be sure to add you all to my prayers this week.

I learned over the weekend that my friend's mom passed away from skin cancer late last week. She was only 56. Though I haven't seen her (or my friend) in years, I will always remember this woman with great fondness. She was vibrant, motherly, warm, and always so welcoming. And her prim style was always an inspiration. I loved spending time in her home back when I was in high school. And I'm sad for her family because they've truly lost their anchor.

So, as you say, the best thing to do is to really LIVE and remember. To be sure to tell others what they mean to us and to set out to do all we can each day. As I get older, I am trying harder to be this way. To do the things that I love, to take chances, and to make those lasting connections.

Such a timely post for me. And another reminder to cherish every moment.

All the best to you and your family...

Tracey said...

Dan, first of all, I'm so sorry for the sudden loss of your sister-in-law's mother. How tragic, and so young! Bad things do happen to good people, and it is a reminder that life is fleeting, and we need to decide how much positive energy we're going to squeeze into the time He gives us on this earth.

Like the saying goes, "live today like it's your last."

Take good care, and blessings to you and your family. ~ Tracey

Suzanne said...

Dan, Sorry to hear of your loss. My Sympathy to you and your family. I love your spirit and soul. I am also 58 and your tribute really has inspired me. Life is truly a precious gift from God, and should NEVER be taken for granted. Thank you. Love and Prayers, Suzanne p.s. first time visitor and really enjoyed your blog. Please keep writing and sharing.

JenR65 said...

I am very sorry to read this, your SILs family will be in my prayers!

Sharon said...

I was so sorry to hear about the tragic news.
Prayers for your SIL and her family.
Your words were so inspirational to me.

Kaaren said...

How tragic this loss must be to you and your family. You will all be in my thought and prayers.

Thanks also for the reminder.

Kath ~★The Olde Weeping Cedar ★~ said...

I'm so, so sorry, Dan.
Praying for your SIL and her family...

TGC

Willow said...

Dan I think you done a wonderful job turning what happened into a positive post. I truly am saddend by the news of your SIL's Mother. It's never an easy thing to loose someone you love and who means soooo much to you and others. I pray that comfort is sent your way and encompasses everyone who was touched by this loss. You all will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugeee Huggs and lotsa love
TJ

getty825 said...

Dan, so sorry to hear of this. Yes we must make the most of everyday and see the blessings in each other.

purensimple said...

Dan, you have no idea how much this post meant to me...this past weekend I almost lost my SIL to something I can't comprehend. Tragedy can strike when we least expect it and you are right we have to realize to live each day as if it is our last. I pray that you all find peace in these coming weeks and that your SIL's mother is at peace and with our loving Lord.
Blessings, Theresa

Red Shed Primitives said...

Dan~
So sorry to hear of the loss of your sister in law's mother. What a tragedy. We truly do need to live each day to the fullest & express our love & appreciation to those around us. I will keep you & your family in my thoughts & prayers.
~Aaron~

Dale Elizabeth said...

Oh Dan, I am so sorry for you and your family. How tragic! And she was so young! I am hearing more lately how dangerous falls are really.
I have felt your pain in the questtions, about loved ones, and life. It is shocking what a difference one day can make.
You are paying tribute to her tho thru this post reminding people what is important.
Blessings,
Dale Elilzabeth

Joanne said...

So sorry to hear about your SIL's mother - how sad for the family. Just a reminder that we just don't know what's around the corner - thoughts and prayers for you and your family

Lynn @ Painting Thyme Needfuls said...

Dan,
I am so very sorry for your loss and this family's loss.I am new follower of yours. Your words have hit home hard. My oldest son has been estranged from us for almost 2 years. He has 2 young daughters age 2 and 2 months that we are not allowed to see. The oldest grandchild we knew for 4 months the second we have not met.....we have never stopped loving our son or trying to be a part of his life and our grandaughters.... I only wish he will realize that before a tradegy such as this happens ....and then he will realize that life really is bigger than all that "little stuff".....but unfortunately what he doesn't realize now is.....we can NEVER get back the time we have lost.
MY thoughts are with you at this difficult time.
Hugs,
Lynn

janet said...

Being new to this blog site I am just now reading about the loss of your sister in law's mother...I am so sorry for her loss and yours...You are a great brother in law and your insight is inspiring to say the least...I find all of your blogs uplifting...